how women can get along better with other women

What inspired me to write this article is a Meetup.com group that I started. It is a spirituality women’s meetup group, and though spirituality is half of the reason I created the group, the other half of the reason was because I wanted to provide a safe environment where women could come together and be completely themselves without self consciousness of what others may think of them.

If they’re quiet they can be quiet, if they want to share they can share, if they have a breakdown and cry because they are struggling with something we will all be there to listen, give hugs, and comfort for that person if they desire it. Needless to say, this group has definitely changed my life and given me some wonderful insight as to how us women can get along better with other women.

The very first thing I would recommend, which was sparked by Yoga with Kassandra’s Art of Abundance course, is to practice collaboration instead of competition.

So when you see a woman in person or online, you notice yourself judging or getting jealous over something that they have, some way that they get to live, or their looks, you genuinely stop, breathe, pause, and give them a genuine and unique compliment. Whether that is a comment online, a direct message, or in person. If it is in person make sure to say it as if this person was actually your friend, no need to raise the pitch of your voice, no need to say it fast, make it real, raw, organic, genuine and mean it. Say it with a sweet smile.

Instead of being jealous, getting bitter, or angry, notice this person and admire them, be impressed by them, and realize that what you are seeing in them is a way that you want to be yourself. So you can use them as sort of a mirror for your own desires. Let them inspire you to be better, to be more, to try harder. There is plenty to go around, so don’t get upset if they have something you don’t. That doesn’t mean you’ll never have that too.

Tell every woman you know and every woman you meet that she is safe to be completely herself. Ditch the small talk, don’t talk super fast, pause after they are done talking so that you really listen and digest what they are saying to you, make eye contact, be present, actively and intently listen to them, recognize that they are a human being with dreams and desires and emotions. Let them know that if they are unhappy or having a bad day that they don’t have to always respond “good” when you ask how they are. Tell them that they can be completely themselves with you no matter how they are feeling.

I cannot describe to you how incredibly freeing this is.

We live in a world and country where we are almost constantly concerned of what others think of us and are almost always trying to put our best face forward, expected to reply “good” when asked how we are, I mean the list is endless but we all know the social norms that are expected of us. I say screw the social norms, make a safe space, be real, be raw, be vulnerable, open your heart, and see how that instantly invites others to do the same. Almost as if a silent massive sigh of relief is taken by you and the women you start to be around.

When you slow down, become present, and allow others to be fully themselves you instantly make your life and their life so much better and allow them to be the fullest expression of themselves and their emotions in that moment.

So don’t be fake, don’t be forced, don’t say what you think you should say, don’t be afraid to take pauses, and I suggest always telling the women you’re around and that you are friends with that you are making these changes because if they know ahead of time they will understand better and feel free to do the same. The last time I met up with a friend I hadn’t seen in years I did not communicate to her that I now live this way in my friendships and she was tangibly uncomfortable around me. She wasn’t used to being treated that way and even pulled her phone out often because she didn’t know what to do with herself.

After the lunch was over I realized what a mistake I had made in not expressing this new way of life to her. So make sure to be open and communicate this with the women in your life.

I hope you loved this article.